For My Father

Note: My dad passed away from the effects of lung cancer on June 16, 2000, the Friday before Father’s Day. The following is from a journal entry I wrote on August 18, 2000. I post it here in memory of him and to encourage every one of you who has lost a dad too soon…

I want him back. I want to talk to him about golf or NASCAR or Sunday school or anything else. I want to share a meal with him. I want to go back to being little and go to work with him on a Saturday and draw pictures of police cars at his desk. I want to just be with him. [Read more...]

How To Make Disciples Who Make Disciples

I’m passionate about the Why and the What of disciple-making. I can talk about the theology and philosophy of disciple-making all day. Yet, I’m also aware that there is a rising awareness and conviction among people about the importance of making disciples  (see #3 in my denomination’s recent report on declining baptisms) and they’re asking the next question after Why and What. They want to know How. The fact is we won’t create a disciple-making culture until we are making disciples and teaching them to do the same!

Here’s one approach to disciple-making, called the triad model, that I have used effectively in both established church and missional settings. [Read more...]

A Thought on Defending the Faith

I’ve been reading through 1 Peter in my devotional time lately. This little letter in the New Testament grips me because it addresses the early church as it is beginning to encounter the full-on assault of a hostile culture. The Holy Spirit, through the pen of Peter, is answering the question – “How should we live as Christ-followers when it seems like all elements of society are opposed to us?” At the time he was writing, persecution was becoming a reality for the early church, starting with social marginalization. These first-century Christians were facing job loss, neighborhood shunning, and even violent attacks because of their claim that Jesus Christ is Lord and a lifestyle that matches the courage of their convictions. Sound familiar?

Right in the middle of that context I discovered a verse that I am guilty of taking out of context. In fact, if you’re a Christ-follower who grew up in the youth groups of the 1970′s and 1980′s you probably have heard or used the verse out of context, too: “always being prepared to make a defense to anyone who asks you for a reason for the hope that is in you” (1 Peter 3:15 ESV). It is the “Apologetics” verse. Apologetics comes from the Greek work in that verse that we translate “defense.” Clearly the verse (really a part of a verse) is telling Christians that we have a duty to be able to give a verbal defense as to why we believe the things that we believe about Christ. During my crisis of faith in college, the Lord used books that were classified as apologetics books to help me really understand why I could trust the Bible and why the claims of Christ are true. I am grateful that in His providence and grace God directed me to such helpful material.

But when I read the bigger context of this call for apologetics, I get a bigger picture of what Peter is suggesting about defending the faith:

But even if you should suffer for righteousness’ sake, you will be blessed. Have no fear of them, nor be troubled, but in your hearts honor Christ the Lord as holy, always being prepared to make a defense to anyone who asks you for a reason for the hope that is in you; yet do it with gentleness and respect, having a good conscience, so that, when you are slandered, those who revile your good behavior in Christ may be put to shame. For it is better to suffer for doing good, if that should be God’s will, than for doing evil. (1 Peter 3:14-17 ESV) 

Do you see it? Peter is suggesting a posture that is far greater than just knowing facts about the reliability of the Bible or the different theories of Jesus’ death and resurrection. Peter is saying this: Your conduct is your greatest apologetic. When you suffer as a consequence of your faith, earn a hearing for what you believe by how you behave. This is sobering!

Recently, James Emery White said “Old school apologetics are out. New school apologetics are in.” As one in the old school his words caused me tension. Yet I believe he’s right. Too many times I’ve been more concerned about winning the argument about Jesus than winning the person to Jesus. As we face more opposition by the norms of culture and the laws of our governments, Christ-followers will have more opportunities to show the difference that being a disciple of Jesus makes in our lives. It’s what an increasingly non-religious world needs to see before they will want to hear.

As Christianity becomes the minority culture in America we will have more opportunities to defend our beliefs. We will do so by faithful conduct in the midst of opposition that an unbelieving world will find unbelievable. Now that’s really old school!

 

 

Doing Evangelism Differently

I live in a small subdivision in the suburbs. In an effort to stay informed and communicate with one another, our community has a Facebook group. Three times in the past three months there have been posts on our Facebook page about strange people going through our neighborhood. In each case words like “beware” or “heads up” were used to alert us to the danger of these people, letting us know how they were dressed and that they were carrying books that looked like Bibles, and that they were probably “religious.”

 No Soliciting
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In the last of these instances, earlier this week, my neighbor politely asked them to leave because our neighborhood has a sign clearly posted at the entrance that says “No Soliciting.” The visitors were, by my neighbor’s account, very rude to him. It turns out that these visitors were Jehovah’s Witnesses canvassing our neighborhood with invitations for an upcoming event. [Read more...]

Doing Church Differently: Leadership Factors


One of the challenges that must be confronted in doing church differently is leadership. The church in the United States has taken its form and identity from that Christendom worldview, yet our context is increasingly post-Christendom. This shift must cause us to examine our paradigms of leadership. The radical separation of clergy from the laity is certainly a holdover from Christendom. In his book, Unfinished Business (originally published as The New Reformation), Greg Ogden supports this idea by noting that while the Protestant Reformation reclaimed the Scriptures for the people, it did not reclaim leadership and ministry for the people. 

Follow the leader
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Jesus was clear in the Great Commission that the role of every disciple, not just pastors, is to make disciples. [Read more...]

The Church’s Identity Issues

I have previously staked my claim that much of how we do church in North America has its roots in a Christendom mindset. If the modern church was born out of Christendom it has been raised in consumerism. In fact, I would press the point to say that churches and church models—even the most progressive—find their identity coming more from a Christendom and consumerism paradigm than a biblical paradigm. Biblical images of church have given way to images of church that are spawned from history or contemporary culture.

All plastic shopping carts.
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In A Light to the Nations, Michael Goheen offers nine images of the church that reflect the legacies of Christendom, the Enlightenment, and consumerism more so than the Bible. [Read more...]

Should We Do Church Differently? Cultural Factors

Many commentators on culture agree that the United States is quickly moving into a post-Christendom context. Tim Chester and Steve Timmis observe that in a Christendom context, “the assumption is that Christianity should have privileged status in the cultural and political discourse of the nation…But the reality of Christendom is fading fast, overtaken by secularism and pluralism” (Everyday Church, 19). In other words, Christians are finding themselves more and more on the margins of society. While this is the context in which we find ourselves, the dominant models for church, evangelism, and mission are reflective of a Christendom mindset. Consequently, even the most contemporary reflections of these standard models struggle to make disciples.

The Separation Of Church And State
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In On the Verge, Alan Hirsch and Dave Ferguson posit that even the most progressive forms of church found in North America will likely be acceptable to—at best—40% of the population. This may be a generous number. “The brute fact,” say Hirsch and Ferguson, “is that most of the evangelical church leaders who will read [their book] will be white, suburban, and middle class, and the equally stark reality is that within decades, Anglo-Saxon Americans will be in the minority in the U.S.—yet our churches don’t seem to be responding to this reality” (27). We must begin to raise up leaders to go to the other 60%: those who will likely never be attracted to the church on the corner, no matter the dress code or music style. [Read more...]

Planting the Church or Planting the Gospel?

This post originally appeared on The SendSFL Blog. Cross-posted here by permission.

We didn’t mean to plant a church. In 2008, when our family relocated to the suburbs of Raleigh-Durham, my concept of church planting was pretty conventional. It involved the need for funding, a core group, a place to meet, etc. My conversations with other planters and some experience with church planter assessments had convinced me that I wasn’t wired with the entrepreneurial skill set to be successful as a church planter. If this is where you have found yourself, keep reading.


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As with all transitions, our move gave my wife and me an opportunity to reevaluate our values and behaviors. One of the things we wanted to do well in our current setting was to order our everyday lives around Jesus’ Great Commandment to love God with everything we were and to love our neighbors as ourselves (Matthew 22:37-40). We wanted to see a new culture emerge in our community—a disciple-making culture. We believed that the missionary pattern of the Apostle Paul was foundational to creating this culture. Particularly gripping was what we read of Paul’s life with the people of Thessalonica: “So, being affectionately desirous of you, we were ready to share with you not only the gospel of God but also our own selves, because you had become very dear to us” (1 Thessalonians 2:8, ESV).

[Read more...]

The Father Factor

As you celebrate dads this Sunday, please don’t miss an opportunity to encourage the fathers around you to be faithfully present in the lives of their kids. It is the nature of a man to question his significance. We want to do things we will excel at, things we are confident in, and things that will make us feel of worth or value.

father and son [1]
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This near-obsession with significance leaves us intimidated by the specter of failing as fathers. So, some dads don’t even try because they aren’t sure what to do when they show up. Of course it’s important to learn the skills of being a good father, yet the reality is that just showing up matters. Study after study reinforces the critical place fathers play in the lives of children and their mother. In an editorial last fall, Tony Dungy observed that nearly one in three children lives apart from their biological fathers, and those kids are two to three times more likely to grow up in poverty, suffer in school, and have health and behavioral problems. They are also at a higher risk for child abuse.

When God designed the family He factored in fathers. He gave lots of instructions to fathers about passing the torch of knowledge and relationship with God. The bottom line, dads are important. At times it seems to call out the importance of dads is taken as an insult to all the moms in the world. It should not be seen this way. Of course we celebrate moms, particularly the single mother who is carrying the weight and responsibility of two parents. But just as the mother is unique in the family, a father is equally irreplaceable. Consider the words of Christian artist Lecrae in a recent Christianity Today article in reference to growing up without a father in the home. “I grew up and still didn’t know what it meant to be a man.” Lecrae’s story and the statistical evidence only bear out the reality of God’s model and the importance of fathers in the context of discipleship (See Ephesians 6:4 and Colossians 3:21, for example).

Leave no doubt in the minds of the men in your life about the significance they have for their families. Encourage them, honor them, praise God for designing them.

 

You Can Help Your Kids Dream Big Dreams

As we grow up society can suck the dreams right out of us. We are told to be realistic, not to get our hopes up. By the time they reach college or work age, most kids’ dreams have been managed down to a very narrow window of opportunity based on perceived skills or academic achievement. We send conflicting signals. On the one hand children are told to follow their dreams and that they can be whatever they want to be. On the other hand, when they share those dreams adults can start to tame them under the good motive of not wanting children to be disappointed.

Zoned Out
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Last week our family spent time sharing our hopes and dreams for the future with one another. I must confess that I have not done a lot to cultivate this area of my kids lives. Children have wonderful imaginations, hopes, and dreams. But I’m afraid I have been more concerned with what they need to know for growth in godliness than I have been with hearing what God is doing in their hearts already. Simply put, I’ve done more talking than listening.

The idea came from a podcast by Michael Hyatt encouraging people to dream big. Hyatt’s insight was very helpful, but I wanted to try to help my kids not just dream in the abstract. I wanted them to begin to dream and pray towards God’s best for their lives, not just their own whims and desires. It’s good to set goals and have dreams, but these can easily become self-centered unless we see them through the lens of Scripture.

“Now to him who is able to do far more abundantly than all that we ask or think, according to the power at work within us, to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, forever and ever. Amen.” (Ephesians 3:20-21 ESV)

This year, our family adopted Ephesians 3:20-21 (above) as our theme verse. We have seen God do amazing things around us in answer to prayer over the last few years, but I was convicted by this Ephesian doxology that we had not prayed big enough prayers. We worship a God who can do more than we can ask or even imagine according to His power and for His glory! I want my kids to have faith in a big God who can empower them to do magnificent things as they seek to obey and glorify Him.

So, here’s what we did for our family devotional time last week:

1. Dream – I sent everyone (including me and Brandie) off with a sheet of paper and told them to write down 5 things they wanted to do in their lifetime. I told them that nothing was off limits.

2. We gathered back together and took turns sharing one dream each at a time around the circle until we heard all 5 from everyone. Not all the dreams were super-spiritual. They included things like playing in a rock band and traveling the world. But also included were things like going on mission trips, serving special needs kids, helping in a nursing home, and seeing God’s will accomplished in our neighborhood.

3. Once we had heard all the dreams I read Ephesians 3:20-21. Then, I asked us to consider which of those dreams were God-sized. Each person shared a little more and we talked about how God can do more than we can ask or think.

4. Then we prayed and asked God to be glorified and help us to dream the dreams He had for us as individuals and a family for His glory.

I learned things about my kids and my wife that I had not known before. They also learned some things about their dad they didn’t know. Now I have a better insight into who they are and how I can serve my family as a father and husband. I can help channel those dreams toward godliness. I can pray more specifically for my family. I can ask better questions to help them focus on Christ and His glory based on their God-given passions.

What’s next? Our goal for the summer is 100 dreams each. Perhaps some of these dreams will become goals. Maybe others will be the seeds to greater focus later on down the line. Some don’t seem realistic, but that’s the point of dreams anyway right?

So, how about you? What are your dreams for your family? What are their dreams? You won’t know until you ask!